Missed the last episode?
Imagine a discussion where logic ruled and plastic didn’t stand a chance. We saw what happened when a group of scientists, engineers, and physicists analyzed period care over Chinese takeout. But today, we leave the lab and enter the living room. Want to see for yourself?
👉 Read here: The Big Bang Theory of Periods: Why Plastic Logic Fails
Offscript Period Series | Ep 06
Logic vs. Lajja: A Middle-Class Guide to Saving Health (Not Just Money)
(In the Gullak’s voice) Middle-class parivaar aksar sehat ki planning nahi karte. Yahan planning kam, adjustment zyada hota hai. Doctor tab aate hain jab bukhaar teen din cross kar jaye. Periods pe baat tab hoti hai jab koi serious problem ho jaaye. Aur Stress? Stress vess kuch nahi hota, sab fizul ki cheeze hai. That’s just life!
Aur mein, Gullak?
Woh sirf paiso ka nahi hota, woh priorities ka hota hai.
Agar Mishra parivaar ko poocha jaaye ki sehat mein invest karna kya hota, toh shayad woh iss tarah jawab dete. Aaiye dekhte hai…
(Mishra parivaar in a serious discussion mode on their chhat)
Shanti Mishra: The Home Finance Minister
Naa iss ghar me bullet aayegi, na scooter - ayega to ek sofa - woh massager wala.
Yaha din bhar kam karke halat kharab ho gayi hai meri, kisi ko kuch padi bhi hai?
Sab ke liye sab karti hoon, lekin apna check-up humesha “baad mein” aata hai. Har mahine wali bimari ho ya dard, aadat ho gayi hai sehne ki. Par ab samajh aa raha hai ki jo cheez roz-roz andekha karte hain, wahi ek din sabse zyada mehengi padti hain.
Padha tha maine, WhatsApp pe.
Annu (frustrated after hearing the word WhatsApp): “Mummy aap pehle to WhatsApp ke messages par vishwas karna band kijiye yaar, jhooth hota hai woh sab!”
Shanti continues: “Main koi expert nahi hoon, bas itna jaanti hoon agar mai ya tumhare papa wapis se bimar pad gaye na, toh pura ghar ulat-pulat ho jayega.
Isliye agar thoda jyada kharcha karke acchi aur saaf cheez mil rahi hai, toh woh kharcha samajh kar nahi, samajhdari samajh ke le leni chahiye. Aman ne mujhe Amazon chalana sikhaya hai, toh maine turant Saathi ke sanitary pads mangwaye. Suna hai, usme plastic nahi hai, toh shayad jalan-khujli ki chinta kam hogi.
Woh kya kehte hai...pre-tenshun is better than cure.”
Santosh Mishra: “Arrey Shanti, pre-tenshun nahi, pre-vention hota hai. Tension toh tum deti ho.”
Shanti: “Haan haan, wahi. Angrezi ke professor mat baniye, dawai laane mein toh pasine chut-te hain aapke.”
Santosh Mishra: The Peacekeeper (with High BP)
“Arrey Shanti, tum rehne do, tumhari adhi takad humse jhagadne mein chali jati hai. Subah subah kam chillaya karo thoda…
Aur haa, mujhe tension nahi hota. Bas BP thoda high rehta hai. Daftar ka kaam, ghar ki zimmedari, bacchon ka future, ye sab sochna padta hai ji.
Par jab doctor ne kaha “stress sehat ke liye accha nahi hai” tab pehli baar ehsas hua ki aadmi bolta nahi hai, iska matlab yeh nahi ki andar sab theek hai. Agar hum apna dukh apne hi parivaar ko nahi batayenge, toh kisi paraye ko batayenge?
Toh isiliye maine tumhe (Shanti) bata kar rakha hai ki agar woh tumhari har mahine wali bimari ki wajah se bhi kuch ho raha hai, toh akele sehna nahi hai. Humko bataye, tab hum kuch kare na. Aur yeh hamare do anmol ratan, woh kab kaam aayenge? Unko bhi kuch kam bataya karo, madat ho jayegi tumhe.
Ek toh ye health insurance ka rate itna badh gaya hai ki bhai humse toh aise turant nahi hoga, usse accha ye hai ki hum sab apne sehat ka khayal rakhe.”
Shanti looks at him, disappointed, “Health insurance ka chodo, apse chowmein mango toh bhi aapka BP badh jata hai.”
Annu Mishra: "Logic Ki Dukaan"
“Exam clear ho jaaye, phir sab theek ho jayega. Yahi soch ke chal raha hoon.
Raat bhar jagna, stress mein rehna, kabhi-kabhi galat aadatein…”
Santosh cuts him off: “Abey, konsi galat aadaton ki baat kar rahe ho tum?”
Annu fumbles: “Arey papa, kar di na wohi wali baat. Hum apni thodi baat kar rahe hai, bas bata rahe hai, ki aaj kal ke launde kya kya kar jate hai, jane anjane mein…
…sab temporary lagta hai. Par sach yeh hai ki agar body saath chhod de, toh zindagi udhar hi fullstop mardegi.
Ghar ki baat hai lekin bata hi deta hoon. Parso maine apne general awareness ke notes mein padha tha ki plastic pads jo hote hain, vo sehat ke liye theek nahi hai. Acha kiya mummy aapne woh Saathi ke pads mangwa liye. Isse kehte hai bhai ek logical investment. Abhi do rupaye jyada kharch karo aur badmein hospitals ke bills bachao. Simple!”
Mummy ke liye order kar raha tha, toh socha khud ke liye bhi kar lun to unka neem ki kangi mangwa liya. Aapne dekha nahi kya, hairfall badh gaya hai mera? Hum to bas itna chahte hai ki hamara style Papa jaise na bigad jaye. Bas!
Aman Mishra: The ‘Innocent’ Observer
“Mujhe sab baccha samajhte hain. Par hame bhi bohot baate samajhme aati hai. Body changes, periods, confusion- ghar mein in baaton pe zyada charcha nahi hoti. Halaki dheere dheere ye badal raha hain. Dhyaan dete hum college mein, iss liye sab pata hai, samjhe?
Main Bittu ko bhi bolta hoon ki bhai ye sab normal hai aur hum hi ye sab cheeze chupa kar rakhenge toh hamare aas-paas ki ladkiyan humse openly kaise baat kar payengi. Vo toh abhi bhi zara nadaan lagta hai lekin mujhe baat samajhme aa chuki hai.
Abhi ke liye shayad itna kaafi hai.”
Bittu Ki Mummy: The CCTV Camera
(A voice comes in the middle of nowhere)
“Arey Annu ki mummyyyyyy…”
Pointing at Aman: Utho beta, ghar pe mehman aaye to unko baithne ke liye jagah honi chahiye ki nahi? Haa toh main aapki charcha sun rahi thi…mera matlab hai - woh mein kuch papad sukhane chhat pe aayi thi na isliye sunayi diya…
Sehat ka kya hai beta, aaj hai, kal nahi.
Pehle lagta tha ki jo zyada kamata hai, wahi zyada bacha leta hai. Par jab paas ke ghar mein bimaari aati dekhi na, tab samajh aaya ke doctor ke saamne sab barabar ho jaate hain. Humse woh kya kehte hai - biodegardabal?
Annu: “b-i-o-d-e-g-r-a-d-a-b-l-e”
Bittu ki mummy continues: “Ha wohi, jo kuch bhi…woh nahi ho payega humse. Suna hai, boht mehenga ata hai. Ab aisi waisi cheezo pe koi itna kharcha kare? Na baba na. Mere toh woh plastic wale pads hi sahi hai. Bilkul saste!”
Shanti Mishra: “Arrey Bittu ki mummy, Kitty party mein hazaaron uda dengi, aur sehat ke naam pe kanjoosi? Baad mein kuch bimari ho gayi na, toh wahi kitty wali saheliyan sirf fruits leke aayengi, madat karne nahi. Isliye kehti hoon, quality cheezo pe kharcha kijiye.”
Conclusion: Gullak: Paiso ka nahi, Priorities ka
Gullak: “Gullak mein paise jama kiye jaate hain, lekin ghar tab chalta hai jab log sehatmand hote hain. Middle-class parivaar aksar health ko tab yaad karte hain jab problem saamne aa jaati hai. Tab tak kuch kuch ignore ho chuka hota hai.
Mein aap sabko yeh yaad dilana chahta hu ki chhoti-chhoti aadatein hi sabse badi security banti hain. Time par check-ups, ghar ke andar khuli baatein, aur safe choices future ke bade kharche se bachaate hain. Sehat par kharcha karna luxury nahi, samajhdari hai.
Kyuki paisa dobaara kamaya ja sakta hain, par sehat ka koi shortcut nahi hota. Isi liye, agar Gullak mein sabse pehle kisi cheez ke liye jagah honi chahiye, toh woh sehat ke liye.”
Coming Next Week:
We’re trading the terrace for the high-stakes drama of the scrub room.
The family drama is staying, but the stakes just got a lot higher. Our next guests don’t just treat symptoms; they look for the "Why", usually while walking down a hallway at 2x speed with a coffee in hand.
Next week, we go under the fluorescent lights to find out why "normalizing" discomfort is a habit we need to break.
It’s a beautiful day to save lives (and your skin). Can you guess who we’re scrubbing in with?
Disclaimer: This content is a work of parody and imaginative storytelling created for social awareness and education. All characters referenced are fictional and used purely for cultural commentary. This content is not affiliated with, endorsed by, or connected to the original creators, networks, or rights holders of Gullak.